I Love You but You Are Driving Me Crazy

 

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According to Weddingwire June is the third most popular month for weddings in the past two years.  I just attended the wedding of one of my nephews in a beautiful mid-west, quaint farm setting.  During one of the dances, the DJ asked couples to keep dancing if they had been married for a specific number of years.  He kept going until one couple remained on the dance floor.  It just so happened to be my parents, the grandparents of the groom, left alone, swaying to the music. My parents have been married fifty-eight years!  The DJ asked my nephew and his new bride to accompany my parents in the center of the dance floor.  He then proceeded to ask my parents what advice they had for the newly married couple to get them to fifty -eight years of wedded bliss.  My mom answered first, “Just hang in there!” My dad, the quiet guy he is agreed.

This past winter, I participated in a Proverbs 31 Online Bible Study where we studied Karen Ehman’s book, “Keep Showing Up, How to Stay Crazy in Love When Your Love Drives You Crazy”.  Chapter One starts out, “Why is this so hard? I can’t do this anymore! I cried out to God as I sat crossed-legged on the bedroom floor of our very first apartment, my eyes stingy with hot, salty tears”

Now, those of you reading this who know me well, and those of you who don’t are going to find out super quick, I won’t be giving you advice on marital bliss.  You see, I have sat feeling exactly like Karen Ehman not once, or twice, but well I am not proud to say three times.  She is exactly right.  Marriage isn’t easy.  You have to, as my mom said to my nephew, “just hang in there”, and as Karen says, “Keep Showing Up”.

We find the  “Mr. or Mrs. right”, fall in love, and have expectations of the “perfect” life together.  Our “happily ever after”.  Then just like that, you are living with who? Who is this person who doesn’t pick up after themselves, makes snide comments, doesn’t appreciate your cooking, forgets your birthday, and argues with you.  What? A disagreement?  We never had a single tiff while we were dating! You thought getting married and living with the person of your dreams was going to be, well… dreamy, not a nightmare on some days.

Now, don’t get me wrong, what can be better than traveling, laughing, sharing in a hobby or a mutually loved cause with the one you love.  But we do, and I speak from my own experience here, have to manage our expectations of what it really means to say “I do” in front of God and our friends and families.  It means it isn’t going to be easy everyday and we are going to need Jesus to help us to “Keep Showing Up.” (And the wise words of Karen Ehman!)

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My first two marriages, I didn’t keep showing up.  I quit showing up on my first marriage due to abuse and for my safety I needed to leave. My second marriage ended sadly because of addiction and because I had turned away, forgetting about God’s love, grace, and forgiveness.

Don’t get me wrong here, I didn’t go into my other marriages wanting or thinking they were going to end in divorce, not at all.  I grew up in a household with exemplary examples of wedded couples who kept showing up for each other through thick and thin.  Both sets of my grandparents had been married well over fifty years and as I mentioned, my parents have been married fifty-eight years.  I know for a fact, it hasn’t been and wasn’t always wedded bliss for any of them, but they kept showing up for each other.  Through The Great Depression, various wars (at home and abroad), sickness, loss of jobs, loss of children, life.  Hard, messy, tough, life.  The married couples in my life kept showing up, kept loving, kept honoring, kept serving, and kept praying for one another. Those are the examples I had and had intended to follow.

Today, I truly believe that God broke many chains and I am free from so many lies of the evil one. He brought this amazing, some days sandpaperish man (When you read Karen’s book Chapter 2 tells you all about the “Sandpaper Spouse”!)  into my life for me to love, honor, and cherish for the rest of my life! Today I don’t believe and react to the lies I was once listening to. As John 8:44 reminds us, “He (Satan) was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”

Friend, we don’t have to listen to the lies Satan tells us about our marriages and our spouses. The simple truth is, some days it is hard to see this I get it, but our spouses are not the enemy.  Satan loves to spin webs of lies, its his job and it is our job not to get tangled and stuck in them. (I promised I wouldn’t give marriage advice, I learned all this from the book, emoji happy face!)

If you are crazy in love with your spouse, which I pray you are and if you are not I will pray for things to change in your relationship, then “Keep Showing Up” is a must have tool to add to your marriage tool kit.  A few others I have in mine now and use constantly are my bible (several versions) and another wonderful book by Sharon Jaynes “Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe”.  Sharon shares how to use scripture to pray for your husband literally from head to toe!

I am a super sap when it comes to weddings.  I will be the first to admit I quickly get caught up in all the sparkle, romance, pomp and circumstance, and cake of course! And I don’t think any of that is a bad thing as long as we as family and friends of the bride and groom continue to stand by their sides through all the ups and downs life is going to throw their way,  We don’t need to be a bunch of Debbie Downers when called upon as Christians to share  marital advice with young couples. We need to be honest with them and lead them to Jesus when life starts to turn the wedded bliss in a wedded blister!

I’d love to hear from you.  What do you do to Keep Showing Up in your marriage.  When you comment in the blog today you will be signed up to win a copy of Karen’s book “Keep Showing Up” and Sharon Jaynes’ book “Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe”.

Can’t wait to hear from you!

In the Meantime,

Look Up, Let Go, Live Joy!

 

Don’t Miss the Exhale Bonus Goodies!

Freebies

Friends,

Today is the last day to Pre-Order “Exhale” by Amy Carroll and Cheri Gregory!  After today these AMAZING Free Bonuses will not be available!  

Amy and Cheri have done an exceptional job putting together All Three Bonuses!  They are Excellent Go-To’s!

Pre Order Your Copy Today at:  EXHALEBOOK.COM

I will be doing the Exhale study right here at Living Joy Today in July!!

 

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free as part of Amy Carroll’s and Cheri Gregory’s “Exhale” Launch Team.  The opinions expressed here are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Only Four Days To Exhale!

Exhale book 4 days

Hi Friends,

Happy Friday and its time to say good-bye to May!  Do you know what that means, only 4 days until the launch of Amy Carroll’s and Cheri Gregory’s book, Exhale!

Check out the website Exhale Book, while you’re there, take the “Love Who You Are Personality Quiz”.  I did and found out I’m a Connector.  More about that later.  I’d love to hear what personality type you are, share in the comments.

When you join me for the Exhale study in July we will delve deeper into the quiz and the results.

Freebies

Pre-Order today for these AMAZING Free Bonuses!

Stay tuned for more posts in the next few days as we count down to the Big Launch!

 

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free as part of Amy Carroll’s and Cheri Gregory’s “Exhale” Launch Team.  The opinions expressed here are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Irritable…Discontent…Restless… Help Is Not Hidden

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Friend, It is so easy in our ever so busy lives today to get irritable, discontent, and restless, so much that we can start to spin out of control. Maybe not just start to spin but whirl like crazy.

God’s Word is living and breathing! It fills my soul and brings me peace and calm when I start to twirl and whirl in this world.  Meditating and praying Isaiah 46:4 can take me from the crazy of a Tilt-a-Whirl to a front porch swing in a matter of minutes.

Heavenly Father,

I know that you have created me and you are with me until my hair is gray, and grayer than it already is!  I have witnessed you carry me through other turmoils and I know you will carry me through today, hour by hour; minute by minute.  Father, thank you for your life sustaining Word, love, grace, and forgiveness.  I have faith that in your time, Father, you will rescue me from the whirling and twirling I am feeling right now.  In the meantime, I will keep my eyes laser focused on you.  My ears and heart open to hear your word.  And I will rise up and go on with the God assignments you have already planned for me today, living and breathing your word and truth.  In Jesus Name, Amen.

 

“Exhale” Be Who God Planned You To Be!

Exhale book Cover

Do you struggle with knowing the identity you want for yourself and the one God planned for you?  Are you tired of pleasing others and always trying to meet their expectations for you instead of following the path God has for you? Are you ready to “Lose who you’re not, Love who you are, and Live your one life well”?

Then this is the book for you my friend.

In their Co-Authored book, “Exhale”, Amy Carroll and Cheri Gregory  walk with you on a journey with Jesus to help you find, through biblical principals, the person God created you to be and love her deeply.

Reading “Exhale” is like having two friends come along side you, hooking elbows, and skipping along a path of beautiful treasures.  Gems of  Jesus’ love and truth shining brightly for you to grab hold of as you journey with Amy and Cheri to take the steps they too have taken and continue to practice, to live their one lives well. They share genuine battles they have faced and overcome, as they have at times had to stop skipping and trudge through the messy to get to the place God was leading them.  Like true friends, Amy and Cheri don’t sugar coat this pilgrimage, friend, after all, they are the Grit ‘N’ Grace Girls.(Check out their podcast, amazing!)

Each chapter concludes with a practical principle to help you practice what you have learned and each section concludes with a “Quick Reference Guide” to summarize the unit.  Super handy for girls on a mission to finding their true selves.

“Exhale” is a book you will want to keep handy to refer back to as you take this journey to “Losing Who You’re Not, Loving Who You Are, Living Your One Life Well”.  It is jam packed with scripture and prayers for daily study to help you stay on the path God has so meticulously and perfectly planned just for you, no one else.

“Exhale” is launching June 4, 2019 at a book seller near you!

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free as part of Amy Carroll’s and Cheri Gregory’s “Exhale” Launch Team.  The opinions expressed here are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Coming Soon To A Book Store Near You! (But You Will Want To Pre-Order Today)

Exhale book Cover

 

Hi Friends,

It’s been a few weeks since my last entry and I have been working on a blog entry about how praying for my son has brought peace to my soul.  Stay tuned.

But today I have super exciting news!  I am on the Launch Team for Amy Carroll and Cheri Gregory’s new book coming out next month, “Exhale, Lose Who You’re Not, Love Who You Are, Live Your One Life Well.”

I can’t tell you how excited I am about this book!  Amy and Cheri are amazing women who love Jesus.  They are each speakers and authors independently, however they team up each week on my favorite podcast Grit ‘N’ Grace Girls.  There, with their guests, they discuss and share “How to grow grit and embrace God’s Grace”.

I will be bringing you reviews from myself and others on the launch team right her at Living Joy Today over the next few weeks.

Also.. wait for it…

I will be hosting a Book Study right here this summer and on the Living Joy Today Facebook Page!  Watch for more information to come!

In the meantime here are the links where you can Pre-order your book today!

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

CBD.com

Proverbs 31

Look Up, Let Go, Live Joy!

Jane Ann

 

The Good Samaritans in the Storm

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The forecast predicted storms for “your drive home”.  Yes, my drive home, one day  not too long ago, after work.  My drive usually takes about 12 minutes give or take a few depending on traffic when I choose the freeway route.  This day, though, I needed to run into the grocery on my way home.  Storms approaching, do I run into the Wal-Mart near work hop on the freeway and be home. Or do I take the scenic route and run into the Kroger near my home.  For whatever reason, I felt like the second option was better, even with storms on the horizon and the back roads take about 5 minutes longer.

Let me cut to the chase here and get to the point of all this.  I made it to the store, grabbed what I needed in record time.  Jumped in my car and as I turned the key to start the engine, it made a grinding sound, you know the one that says, “Hey owner of this vehicle something is way wrong and I am not going to start right now.”

And then, drop,drop, then the heavens opened up and the rain came down.  Not just a sprinkle mind you, a deluge!  I tried again to turn the key, nothing. Just… a tap on my window? What?

Yes a lady dressed in scrubs asked, “Do you need a jump?”  “My husband and I are right here and as soon as the car next to us leaves we can move to that space and give you a jump.”  I thanked her and said I have AAA and I can call my husband we live less than a mile away.  She insisted on waiting, and jumped back in her car.

Meanwhile, the rain not stopping any time soon, I called my husband, he was happy to come get me.  I jumped out ran to the ladies window, thanked her again and let her know my husband could come and get me.  This amazing couple insisted on waiting to help me get my car started.  Just then the car next to me pulled out, the lady (I keep calling her this because I think we exchanged names at some point under my umbrella, but it was raining so hard and we were soaking wet and laughing so hard, that if she told me her name, I didn’t catch it.  Lesson for me, remember the names!) jumped out and we were both standing in that parking spot holding until her husband pulled around.

A few minutes later the cars were connected by the jumper cables and my little beetle was running!  I offered to pay the couple or buy them dinner, they declined and her husband told me if that was his wife he wouldn’t want her to be alone in a storm with her car not running.  I thanked them again, we all jumped into our cars sopping wet and went our separate ways.

This couple demonstrated Philippians 2:3-4 that day.  They put other’s interests, needs above their own.  It would have been so easy for them to see my car not starting and say, “Oh that is too bad for her”, and go on their merry way, making it home before the storms.  But they didn’t.  They stayed to lend a helping hand.

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God calls us to humble ourselves and put others before ourselves. He made the ultimate sacrifice for us I am not always so good at this, and to be quite honest, I don’t know if I would have rendered help to a stranded motorist in a pour down.  However, since that day, being the recipient of another’s good deed, it makes me more aware each day that I need to humble myself daily and look to others’ interests before mine.

We all have busy schedules and our own agendas, but if we all started following this simple command, can you imagine what stories might open the nightly news or the would be the headlines in our news papers?  Stories of hope, not crime and corruption.  Stories of love not hate.

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Join me on a journey to be humble daily and to seek out the interests of others before my own,  A journey to live more like Jesus.  One of humility, love, kindness, and giving.

Have you been the recipient of an act of kindness where someone stepped out of themselves to help you out?  Or were you the one that stepped out of your comfort zone and helped another?  I’d love for you to share your story in the comments.

Wishing you dear friend a very blessed Easter!  He is risen!